Happy Thanksgiving. Except for you clowns in Canada, that is. This is just a letter being sent out to everyone who has emailed us so far, or had publicly declared their allegiance to Rubi Con, or who offered to help us out with the event. Dont think of this as spam so much as a newsletter of sorts. Ill try to put out one of these every few weeks or so to keep everyone informed as to recent events. We have no fancy-shmancy mailing list set up for this yet, so if you dont want to be on for whatever reason than email someone at info@blackelk2.dyn.ml.org, or me at tantalo@mail.id.net. Be likewise advised that if anyone wants to be included here they should send an email to any of the two aforementioned addresses indicating your interest. Also, and so I dont forget, because this is the first mass communication to those people who have thus far expressed an interest in Rubi Con, I wanted to make sure I thank all those people who have offered to volunteer already. No one here at Rubi Con Central Command (RCCC for short, we are located deep within the heart of Cheyenne Mountain in Colorado. With almost 12 miles of solid rock on top of us we are mostly invulnerable to standard yield nuclear devices, so dont even try it.) thinks that we will be able to get through this alone, and we recognize that we need all the help we can get from now until we are all rounded up and publicly executed by some ubiquitous Federal agency for the massive destruction wrought by us onto the hapless citizens of south eastern Michigan. My that was a long sentence, but you know what I mean. This con is, as are most cons, brought about by the dedication and perseverance of many people. So without trying to get too mushy, thanks for your interest in helping us out. AND NOW, THE ACTUAL CONTENT: 1. First of all I should let everyone know that I will be updating the website in the next few days. I will be adding a propaganda page, a place that the Rubi Con Propaganda Division Commandos can call home. I made a few lame banners and small images because some people suggested such things would be nice to have available. This way you can pollute the sanity of your little place on the web with our own brand of madness disguised as a hacker conference. Also, I plan on revamping the Preparing for Rubi Con page, adding more carnage as well as more of our ceaseless yet never uninteresting confrontations with local law enforcement. A note to anyone who finds humor in it: Birmingham cops suck. Well, actually Birmingham sucks in general, but more on that in a bit. So anyway, stay tuned. Revisions are forthcoming to our lame website. However, this sort of brings me to my next point. 2. If anyone feels like making a cool Rubi Con web banner or whatever please feel free to do so. Better yet, feel obligated or even forced into doing so. Because remember kids: while rape isnt cool, forcing people into doing things that they dont want to do IS. At least, this is what my brother tells me, but than again, he hasnt had a girlfriend in years. Anyway, back to the banners. You dont have to have any artistic prowess to participate in this, I mean, take a look at what I already made when you get the chance. Youll see what I mean. However, if you are any good at such things we would greatly appreciate an injection of talent somewhere into this little con of ours. Because, as you can probably tell, we have none to start with. 3. My 10th grade English teacher was always stressing the importance of the segue in a work of literature, and while this certainly isnt anything close to a work of literature, Im going to see what I can get going in that department. Ill explain in a minute, so just bear with me. CONFUSING STORY FOLLOWS: Me and Ron The Machine Ulko were running around Birmingham Michigan on Friday the 20th, and passing out vague references to something called Rubi Con, the only real information about which was offered was that it was coming in May. The unsuspecting citizenry of Birmingham were like putty in our hands to this subversion. This was true only with the possible exception of a group of about five young ruffians who wanted to get into a fight with us. We found out that they all went to a private school in the area, and so after we threatened to erase their credit rating at Abercrombie and Fitch they decided to leave us alone. Good thing too. As me and The Machine finished confusing the population of the city and were leaving Birmingham for night we managed -- somehow -- to intersect with the likes of a speeding F150 4x4. As the story goes, we were walking across westbound Woodward Avenue along 13 Mile, trying to scurry across before the light changed, when some drunk bastard plowed into us at 45 mph. It was sort of an interesting experience, actually. All I saw was a bright red and chrome flash, and suddenly I was on my ass 10 feet from where I had just been standing. We were mostly all right, and a lot better than we could have been. Some courteous citizens rushed over (without getting hit by a car, incidentally) and called 911. A fleet of ambulances arrived after a few minutes to poke and prod us in all manner of unspeakable ways, and then take us to a hospital to be jabbed and probed still further. I was fine, aside from some minor cuts and bruises. The Machine, however, suffered heavy casualties. He managed to fracture his shin, and get the shit kicked out of him by both the mirror of the F150 in question, and by an intimate introduction to Woodward Avenue. As it turned out we really only got grazed by the side of the vehicle, rather than it actually running into us. Which I guess was a good thing as I was walking on the side the truck was approaching, and if it had hit us head on I would have only cushioned the blow for The Machine, and no one wants that. Anyway, were all okay now for the most part. I discovered the wonders of hydrogen peroxide, but Ron is still hobbling around around on his fractured leg. Personally, I just filed this whole incident under, Still more reasons why Birmingham sucks. Which is in addition to the cops there, who for some reason, felt obligated to protect the Ameritech (the local impersonal telco) building from our fliers and our duct tape while we were there. And while Im wrapping up, did anyone catch my segue? It had something to do with inability to put together a con --> inability to cross a street properly. I know its real lame, and about 500 words too late, but you can just blame my English teacher. She told me to do it. 4. Also along the lines of Rubi Con graphics and other forms of propaganda, we are currently stewing over what to do with the Rubi Con t-shirt. I have some ideas of my own, and if push comes to shove I may actually end up designing the shirt myself. But frankly, I would much prefer if someone with some talent (theres that word again) about them might lend their services to the cause. If anyone wants to make a design, or thinks that they know someone who might be either a) interested, or b) capable, than please point them in our direction. We cant pay artists for a design, but they will be lavishly praised and commended for their efforts if we use their submission. Anyway, you might want to keep that in mind in case you see some guy on the street holding a sign saying, Unemployed t-shirt artist. Will work for free ticket to a hacker con in any midwest state. You see, we have to get to him before the kids at X-Con do. 5. As I said earlier, we have yet to set up a fancy mailing list for Rubi Con volunteers, so we really cant bounce ideas off of each other online. However, I was hoping some people might offer their comments on whether or not they think we should produce and distribute a small book of all the technical info discussed at the con. We could ask all the speakers to write up a paper on whatever topic they were planning on talking about, print out a few hundred, and pass them out to attendees. As far as I know, it should not be all that expensive to do, and it would save people from having to record or take notes on all the topics that interested them. Plus, it would allow people to not have to attend all the speakers that they wanted to, because they would have all or most of the information available in the book. Now, Im not talking about anything more elaborate than could be adequately constructed at a friendly local Kinkos, so dispel any thoughts of leather bound tomes with 16 color process on glossy paper. If it costs us more than a few dollars than Ill forget about it. In fact, if it even LOOKS like it cost us more than a few dollars Ill dump the idea. But if anyone has any feelings on the notion Id like to hear them. If anyone knows what other cons do in this regard, and if they do something similar, thatd be good to know too. 6. Okay, last order of business. Someone brought this to our attention a few days ago, and we thought it was interesting enough to pass along. There is a con being held in Minneapolis Minnesota called Rootfest. Its a hacker con just like any other hacker con, conference for the computer underground, computer security professionals, chance to meet people and learn, etc, etc, etc. Anyway, the only real issue is that the event is scheduled to occur on May 21, 22, and 23 1999, which sucks if only because thats a week before Rubi Con. Having that date in addition to a relatively close geographic proximity is bad for both of us, and we are going to see what we can do to come to a compromise on the situation. They say that they dont have a hotel yet, so it might be prudent for them to change their date by a couple of weeks or more. Anyway, this has been formally classified as a bad thing by the legions of paper filers and middle management bureaucrats down here at RCCC. And while our crack teams of scientists agree that it is unlikely that we will have to upgrade the urgency of the situation to a very bad thing, we suggest people begin storing food and water and boarding up their homes. Evacuation plans and suicide orders have been drawn up, but would be unnecessary unless the situation deteriorated into the worse possible scenario, a very, very bad thing. Any who, watch this space for more information. At lest for those of you who actually read the whole damn thing. THIS CONCLUDES THE ACTUAL CONTENT. ONLY SILLY NONSENSE FOLLOWS. DO NOT READ IT. Thanks for reading, Jim Tantalo The Idiot In Charge