Thanks to the unprecedented success of Operation Human Shield last year, we will once again be conscripting brave soldiers into our fearsome Volunteer Korps. We need people to help set up for this year, watch tables, crimp network cable, maintain general law and order, and stand between key organizers and Detroit SWAT team snipers.

Interested in helping make Rubi Con 2003 happen? Read on.

Before you get too excited, understand that volunteering is not simply a way to get in for free. Our volunteers work a lot harder than $50.00 worth of cheap labor. Expect to be on call 24 hours a day for three days straight. Expect to get little or no sleep, food or drugs, and the bottom pickings of conf whores. Expect to get yelled at by Brian at least once. Expect to be reduced to tears by Jim over and over. Expect to be hit on and possibly sodomized by Denis.

As a volunteer you will attend Rubi Con at no charge, get a free conference t-shirt, be privy and witness to the backstage backstabbing and illicit, underage sex that makes Rubi Con so great. Your name (that is, whatever you call yourself) will be printed on the back of the conference shirt. You will be trusted with money, badges, and letting people in the door. You will be expected to watch equipment, and lay some smack down in the event said equipment starts walking away.

Still interested? Fill out our form below:

1. What is your name, or some word that people will associate with you given the obvious implications of the next question?

2. What is your telephone number?

3. Give us a good reason to pick you.

RijilV will conduct the rest of the interview when he calls you.